Tuesday, 21 November 2006

The Sainsbury's Conspiracy

I'm beginning to suspect some kind of evil plot exists to awake me before 6am in order to deprive me of a normal day. By 7pm last night i was absolutely fucking shattered, again, after having done nothing of consequence, other than spending £70 at Sainsburys.

Speaking of shopping, i did check my last few shopping bills for what i've actually bought, cause my cupboards, the freezer and my shelf in the fridge are groaning under the strain of so much stuff. Most of it, i've deduced is actually meat. Other than three sacks of gnocchi, my shelf in the fridge is composed of meat. 20 rashers of bacon, two racks of spare ribs, a packet of ham, a half kilo of mortadella from the deli counter, a packet of pepperoni and a multipack of diced chicken for a meal i still havent made yet.

If its not meat, its cheese, or some other kind of dairy product. In fact, the only thing in the fridge thats NOT either of those two wholesome foodgroups, are the three tomatoes and the tub of black olives from the deli counter that i bought to do a salad which again, i havent made...

Now this isnt to say i'm irked about the situation, far from it - its just that for some reason i seem to be addicted to buying shitloads of food, and then never eat it. Hell, i had a microwave chicken tikka masala for breakfast and 8 poppadoms. FOR BREAKFAST! BREAKFAST FOR FUCKS SAKE!

If i dont actually make the chicken, cream & pesto pasta that i've been planning for days, likewise with the salad - will someone please beat me round the head with a large frying pan??

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